My Sugar Addiction Part 2 of 3

 

 

Next month will mark 2 years since the Lord (Yeshua) intervened and my addiction was broken. My answered prayers came in a way I was not expecting. I started to get sick, I mean really REALLY sick.  Heaviness in my lungs and they felt like they were on fire. I knew I was getting pneumonia (no I was not diagnosed by a doctor and didn't seek out medical help) but knew I could be healed (if it was God's will). I told him I had the faith to be healed. I fully expected that the Lord would approve this righteous desire of my heart and I petitioned the Lord. But the following conversation is what I had at the time. Although I didn't recognize it or rather the clarity wasn't there like it is now.  I heard his voice (thought to thought or spirit to spirit. I didn't hear an audible voice) however, it is a still small voice and I can recognize his voice now.

Yeshua- No my daughter, you will not be healed in this moment and in fact you will be sick a whole week. I am answering your many prayers.

me-Sick a whole week? (my spirits/hope was dashed).Which prayers will be answered,  what are you talking about?

Yeshua- Your sugar addiction/sweets

me-Oh, that!

Yeshua- It will take the whole 7 days for your body to detox. By being sick, it will help loosen your cravings for the sweets.

me-OK- (I didn't like the idea of being sick, but I really wanted the bands of addiction broken.) I submitted.

I usually don't sleep well when I am sick and when I dream while my body is sick it usually offers no solace or peace. So I was surprised when I woke up on the 3rd day and had a very powerful and vivid dream. One that was written upon my heart. I know now, that dream was given to me to help me later on when those temptations came. I would remember the dream I was given and the great strength in it.

Dream from Sat Dec 7th 2013
 I was in this little restaurant with a friend of mine. Society and he himself labeled him as "Gay". He had a dart board full of little balloons on them. For every balloon popped he would roll out his dough on the counter and make 2 biscuits, or was it doughnuts? I don't remember which one it was upon waking. There weren't a lot of costumers. He would go straight up to the board and hit the target. I told him that was cheating and he needed to wait for others to come and do it. Every 3rd turn would be his.
  Some people thought we were engaged because we were so close. They were uncomfortable with the "gay man" and even MORE disturb that me being a Mormon would have and surround myself around "Gay/Homosexual People." I told him I didn't accept his behavior. I told him (my friend) -"We live in a fallen world with fallen bodies and they come with tendencies, attractions but that is not US and through the Atonement of Christ HE can change our fallen nature. (We are all given our own "thorns of the flesh".)
I told him how him being attracted to his own sex was HIS thing he needed to work on (with Christ help) and not to yield to temptation and partake and go down the forbidden path. For me, my body was predisposed towards sugar, my addiction and how it wasn't UNTIL I turned to my Savior was I made whole. I knew I must stay away from it (the sugar). How it started with "store treats and candies' to cutting out homemade treats. In the dream my diet was fruits, veggies, nuts and bread. I loved my bread and the Lord told me I could keep it. Once a week I would have a treat that was yogurt with berries and whipped cream on top. Fresh cream that was whipped up.  This new way of eating had taken place 2 years prior to me talking to my friend. (It was a promise/covenant between the Lord and me).
      At a table my mom and other family members were there. Without even thinking about it I took a bite of dessert. Then I realized what I had done and started to spit it out and clean my mouth out.
 End of dream.

Excerpt form Journal 12/11/13

 This addiction is a thorn. I have turned to food, especially sweets for comfort and love INSTEAD of turning straight to God. I realize now that the Savior has invited me to lay my burdens at his feet and now I am doing just that!-End of excerpt

 

It isn't about Will Power or being Self-Reliant but being God-Reliant that truly counts.

 

I am forever grateful to a wonderful friend who is also my Lord and Savior that has broken the bands of this addiction for me.

 Now the real test came to see if I would keep this gift and continue down the new path or to turn back to my old patterns and lifestyle. Here's another way of putting it: like a dog that returns to his vomit.-2 Peter 2:22 comes to mind.