As time goes by and my understanding of things of the Spirit has deepened I wanted to share this story again, but with more detail and with a new set of eyes.
My Mom's mom Grandma Brumble and I NEVER saw eye to eye (while in the flesh). We were both spit fires. She had the red hair to prove it. When I was a little girl, she made the following statement to my Mom: "She hates me!" To which my mom replied, No mom-she hates everyone!" She past away the summer before my senior year of High School. It didn't really matter to me that she died, I had no feelings for her. Yikes, I know that sounds really bad and harsh but that was where I was.
I remember my mom letting me know over the years since she herself has become a Grandma that she wanted her grandchildren to like her and wanted to be involved in their lives. She didn't want her grandchildren to have the kind of relationship or no relationship with her how it was for her kids and her mom. According to my Mom she told her, "I raised my kids and now it's your turn to raise your own, I will not interfere." We (her mortal family) saw her filled with bitterness and that bitterness was like cancer, eating away and finally killing all her joy and happiness.
Anyways, I didn't realize that I had harbored not only negative feeling towards my own Grandma but in part I was holding her part and she was holding me back. Typing this up I just realized it was 7 years later she came to me while I was sleeping. First thing I noticed besides the flaming red hair and a younger version of herself was her countenance. She was so happy and cheerful (something I really didn't see while I knew her here on earth). She told me she was happy and then her face changed and said,
"We are holding each other back, we are both damned. Neither one of us can continue on our journey until we forgive each other. This is why I had permission to come to you. It was for both our sakes."I (my Spirit) freely forgave her in that moment as I was given understanding- walked in her heart. She forgave me as well. As we did this, peace came over the two of us.
Shortly after Grandma died she came to her sister. Totally different reason and visit then the one with me. My Mom felt left out that her Mom had come to both Aunt Lady and me but not to her. I told her, I am sorry she did not come to you. But I am not proud of why she came to me. She and I needed that visit so that the healing process could begin for the two of us. Out of all her family, the children, grandchildren and great grandchildren, I was the one damning her and in return she was damning me.
This is not something I am proud of. But I am sharing this on here so others can read it and can know there is hope for them and their family as well. I don't know who needs this post but I do know it is for at least 1 person and it was the next message the Lord wanted me to share. Jesus and his Atonement is for real. My grandma and my life were intertwined. So much bitterness and resentment festered in our hearts towards each other, we were mirrors for each other. We could see in the other one what we could not see in ourselves. He gave us (my Grandma and I) each other to learn and grow from.
I am grateful for loving and caring Heavenly Parents and my Savior Jesus. The Atonement is amazing! Forgiveness to others and ourselves is vital. I love my Grandma since that special visit from her. I saw her with new eyes. I saw her how our Savior saw her. I was also able to walk in her heart. To understand the why's and how's of her life with all the background information and her intentions. I can't really described it and I don't remember everything now or rather I am still processing that encounter. But I do know that visit with my wonderful Grandma was a tender mercy of the Lord.
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